so the husband and i are making a move, we are going to move in with a friend as long as nothing gets in the way.
I am kinda leary about it but it has nothing to do with the friend or actually moving. I know we need to move but i don't like change. I like knowing that everything i need is around me. Knowing i can walk to work if I need to. I am going to miss my little apartment which I have grown very attached to. But in the end I guess it is for the better for everyone. And i truly look forward to having money and catching those bills up and helping out a friend.

I heard some shocking news today. My once lesbian friend is getting married. That isn't even the craziest part, she has only been dating him for about 3 weeks. Now I am not against love and marriage but I think that you have to invest some time in getting to know a person and that you cannot know that you want to marry some one after 3 weeks! I love her to death and I will support her but I just don't want her to get hurt. I try to explain to herthat she needs to make sure there isn't any skeleton in this guys closet. Being sneaky like I am I told her I would help her plan the wedding knowing that I am going to take my time just so she can make sure this is what she wants. I know what kind of relationships she usually gets herself in and I just wnat to make sure this isn't one of them The guy seems nice but so did some of the others. She is a great girl and deserves only the best and not all guys see that. I know she watns to be married and have a family one day but rushing into it is not the way. I hope she realizes that I am only looking out for her best interests!

I have recently discovered that I have a new addiction! I am addicted to POGO. How have I come to this realization you ask? Well it's like this. I have joined numerous leagues to play in tournaments on Pogo, I can stay on for 4 or more hours and be perfectly content as long as there are cigarettes in front of me, and I am constantly thinking about the next badge or can't wait till I get home to play whatever game that happens to be on my mind. I guess out of all the types of addictions this one isn't soo bad, well except the back pain from being in this damn chair. But o well maybe one day they will have a PA (Pogo Anonymous)!

As the days go by I sit and wonder what exactly have I done with my life. I mean I know I have succeeded in graduating, getting married and holding a job, but what have I truly accomplished? I haven't graduated college only high school and the job I have isn't the career I want all my life. Each day that passes is just one day I let slip by without obtaining anything. When I go to my high school reunion I want to be able to brag about my life and everything that I have accomplished. I fear that I am going to die without knowing that sense of completion. Every day I worry about death and how short life can really be. It has gotten to a point that I have depressed myself by dwelling on that one fact, the fact the death is unavoidable. I love living even though it isn't the easy thing to do. I cannot seem to motivated myself to go out and achieve the things that I desire to achieve all because in the end I know that death will still come. I wish that I did believe in religion and heaven and hell because then I wouldn't worry so much about death because I know it wouldn't be over for me. But I cannot bring myself to believe in something so hyprocritical as religion. All and all this is a very dark and depressing post but I needed to vent. To continue hold all of this in would in the end be my undoing

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